Sad to say this but I've been in several each one alittle different from the last but still just as bad or worse, I come with a lot of damage now scared to be in another relationship but at the same time I don't want to be alone. My last relationship where I just finally left him about to weeks ago, he was extremely controlling and mentally abusive. It took me a month to get up the courage to say I'm done and leave him. If I have any advise to other people that are in abusive relationship it is to now your worth. It maybe hard at times because you can't see a way out but just know you deserve better. You got this and you are your own king or queen.

Dear Patrick what I do is learn from each relationship my friend find yourself thin u know what u want and don't want tell your next luv what you want from them and if they can't give u what u want move forward and stay happy

Yeah, my last relationship started out good... but then I start finding out so much of what he had told me was lies. I had moved from Wash DC to Los Angeles to be with him. Then I found out he was basically not into sex (he had done like 300+ porn films so go figure). About 6 months in he suggest that I go elsewhere to satisfy my sexual needs, I did. However apparently he was not OK with it and a month later our verbal arguments started to morph into him physically attacking me. Shockingly I still loved him and did hit back. Over the next months later I started to attempt to defend myself but the guilt I felt for hitting someone was killing me. Finally after one particularly bad episode where he knocked me to the floor and repeatedly kicked me in the stomach I turned to a friend (didn't have but two since I had just moved here and only knew my BF at the time) and got out. Only advice I can give is get out immediately. But I know it is hard cuz I loved him and after each attackhe would cry and apologize and tell me he loved me. And at the time I was more afraid of being alone then I was of him hurting me. I have not been in a relationship since him. Even though I have been through therapy, etc I still find it so hard to trust anyone. It's killing me cuz I am not the type to be since. Prior to my abuser I was a serial monogamist, I've been single since July 2002 sick of being lonely all the time.

Document each abusive episode. If you are afraid, GET OUT! Yes that sounds easier than doing it. But go to the police and file a resteaining order. You can press charges if it is violated. He may get angrier so you have to be prepared for that. The most important for me, standing up to him and defending yourself. If that means self defense classes somewhere first then do it. I'm now old so I've had my share. The first time I was young and had no clue how to handle it. The second one was easy. I just reached under the bed and pulled out my gun. I gave a warning that while I would rather not, I would use it if he came near me. I forced him out of his house until I could pack my things. While I'm not advocating retaliation, you do have to save yourself from being loved to death. These issues can escalate and you need to be ready. Getting out, and filling a restraining order is key. Once its in play, anything he does can be used against him... you need to get to a safe place and know how to protect yourself. If that means surrounding yourself with someone who he wont screw with, so be it. Yes he's just jealous now, and his insecurities are all because he loves you. Bla, bla, bla.... I've heard all that bullshit. One hit is the same as 100. Do not allow him to love you to death... if you have friends you can stay with until he's moved on to the next victim then surround yourself with them. Bottom line is that you MUST take control over the situation and get away from him. Not to sound cold but you have to put your big boy pants on and go before he kills you in a fit of rage.

You are not making it sound simple. You are being very clear. You have to decide that you love yourself more. I'm one who believed the "I won't do it again." Wasted some time with that sod. But I managed to find myself, my inner strengths, and the ability to leave.