Ive changed my life in a positive way due to this virus and im actually in a way thankful for it. I used to live reckless and I see that I'm worth more than what I was doing. My mental health changed for the better which is nuts because I thought ot would be for the worse. No I dont feel sorry for myself and I dont let anything bring me down .

For me HIV opened my mentality. I figured that if I could survive a devastating diagnosis and be the provider for my family I can do anything so I did. I asked my then boss to get me into training for a leadership position at the school, did it, kicked ass doing it and promoted to run operations at another school. My road hasn’t been easy by any means but I definitely have an attitude of not getter defeated. It’s very empowering and liberating.

Why for sure it has open my eyes and I thank our God for each day that I'm to say I'm still here

Hello Xavier you're asking very deep an complex questions. No one will disagree with me, that many of our loved ones were taken from us while they were in their 30's. That those loved ones had to go through many different and agonizing ways to die. But to us the survivors it was a wake up call, like being thrown a bucket of iced water. The situation made us more resilient, and willing to make the changes needed in our lives. Now, I will no longer talk in general terms. In my life it's been like bitter oranges. I'm stronger and have taken full responsibility for my life and my choices. I don't blame anyone but myself. I realize that if God wants me on this earth is For good reasons. I've a new found way to look at life and it's many daily problems. That which used to baffle me no longer does. I find beauty in the small wonders that are around me, on a daily basis. I ask anyone, when was the last time anyone watched a sunset, went camping and watched the star lit sky and and a full moon.? To answer directly your question. If I place in a weight , the love and companionship I lost to the virus against all the positive things I've gained. The outcome will always be in a deficit. For true love is one of the things most difficult things to find and it's a priceless thing. But, maybe I'm a bit jaded since I've been alone since I lost my lover. If true love knocks at my door again, my answer might be different. Hugs.Tony.

I am a firm believer that for every action there is an equal reaction and this applies to this disease also. I have been through the nightmare of this disease. I am confident that I am receiving the same amount of benefits. Since I have had HIV I have gone back to university and got Graduate Degrees in Theology, all 6 faiths, that are believed by most of the population also agnostic beliefs. I also have a Graduate Degree in Biblical Studies, Divinity. Ironically it's from Liberty Baptist Seminary, I like a good debate but a 2 year one was a bit much, I'm the first openly gay graduate, note that I was totally celibate. I have since perused writing to keep myself somewhat level mentally. I am trying combining theology and self-esteem building for myself and sharing it as I am learning more about myself. I am starting Monday a therapy group using what I have learned with cognitive process and my former life's study on brain storage processes. I am curious to see how it goes. I will have to let you know.