Thank you for sharing. When l was diagnosed back in 1994 my gf chose to stand by me & raise my 6yr old daughter if l passed. The diagnoses came out of no where after l couldn't shake pneumonia for 3 months. My gf still wanted to be intimate but l was scared to death of infecting her so it was one sided. When l was diagnosed they told me l had 152 t cells & to get my affairs in order bc l had pcp pneumonia & l wasnt going to live. Many yrs went by we lived in constant fear of any infection & a few times l knocked at deaths door. It strained the relationship hard. But as therapy got better so did l but my gf lived in fear. After my daughter left the nest we decided to split up. She hadn't been taking care of herself & it was my way of setting her free. Not that that's for everyone. She had substance abuse issues & as long as l was her crutch she wouldnt seek help. Us splitting forced her to.
But several yrs went by l met a wonderful woman l told her l was positive. By then l was 400-500 t cells and my viral load was undetectable so l felt a lot safer mentally in not infecting anyone. We now have a good life w/ bumps along the way but honesty is what keeps it real with us. I'm a strong believer in making sure l take the best care of me so no one in my family has to worry. I try to keep my mind healthy as well bc l like most hiv+ folks suffer from depression & sleep problems.
The main piece of advice l can offer you is to work on keeping your viral load under 50 for your own health & to diminish the odds of infection when you have sex w your spouse. She stayed with you which says a lot. She obviously loves you & the life you've built together. We are the fortunate ones. With the meds available we get to live our lives. My other piece of advice for all of us is to live our lives having no more regrets. To live it fully. Tell the people in our lives that we love & appreciate them. This is our 2nd chance at life.

My family treats me and this condition as though it does not exist most of the time. I can truly say that everyone i interact with is pretty much accepted it and moved on with me. It's not a big deal anymore. I thank God for that.

When i was diagnosed back in 2017 .i was very depress and stress, anxiety, . i finally told my mom then my sister and my niece . my sister doesnt talk about it. my niece loves and support me, my mom doesnt talk about it much and doesnt ask personal sexual questions. my mom want me to makesure i keep taking my medication and want me to be happy in my life, some times my mom has a problem with my weight she wants me to to be at a certain weight and not get very skinny guess that worries her. my weight is 167lbs now thats not bad. my mom doesnt talk to other relatives about me being hiv postive , the medication helps me to continue to be undectechable .i have a hiv specialist and my primary doctor to talk to and i have every one here to talk to for support which is good :) we all need to enjoy life and celebrate life every day not just on your birthday. Tell people you love them and hug them :)

Its been about 25:yrs plus🙄..since i heard those words..youre positive..i was alone..it made me stronger...though made it tough to allow anyone close.....this is my journey♥️♥️♥️

I can't paint a rosy picture for my situation. My diagnosis blindsided me in the presence of my husband, my father-in-law, and my first partner while I was in the hospital for a simple procedure. I had the emotional support of my first partner, but it would be about a year before the first person in my family found out, which spread like wildfire. My husband refused to discuss it with me, saying, "what's to talk about?" He never dealt with what either of us were going through emotionally, instead putting himself out there for the world to have, telling anyone who'd listen my status, and needless to say, our marriage ended in divorce. I found myself alone. My first partner (of 20 years) continued as a supportive friend, but I would never see my other friends again. Gradually, a new, small circle of friends would form, all of which were also HIV+. My now ex-husband blew back into my life because he had nothing and nowhere else to go. I learned to cope with the loneliness, the depression, and the feelings of hopelessness. Regardless of one's HIV status, the principle of loving one's self to love others became more powerful than ever before for me. I think the hardest thing for me was to make sure I did not let HIV define me, because I am much more than just some one living with HIV.